Tuesday, 5 June 2012

This might be the last time…!!!



This might be the last time…!!!

He was living this fear since long. He knew one day his worst fear may come true. He tried by all possible means to convince their parents, even she dint leave any stone unturned. But their parents dint budge. They always gave more importance to their ideologies, their values, principles over their children’s urge.
The first few years of their relationship were like a sweet dream, a dream they never thought would turn into a nightmare of their parents. They wanted their dream to come true & they wanted their parents to be a part of it too, but destiny had a different plan for them in store.
Since a year or so he was getting the pressure of the situation. While he was reading the sms in his cell phone, memories of last year flashed in front of his eyes.
She tried fighting her tears, unsuccessfully though. The tears rolled down her cheeks. She has the best eyes in the world; in that situation too he couldn’t resist noticing the beauty of her eyes. He kept watching her helplessly as she buried her face into her palms. They were sitting in an air conditioned ice cream parlor in one of the most lavish areas of the city. Despite of the cool ambience she could sense her burning ears. Sona, he started consoling her. What can we do? Haven’t we tried our best? He was struggling to find the right words to pacify her, when she looked up at him & said let’s get married, let’s do register marriage. At the first instance her statement seemed like a foolish revolt resulting from a year long protest. As he smiled helplessly she was staring into his eyes. “Determined” yes determined was the word. After a few seconds of silence he understood that she was determined while making that statement. Are you kidding me? That’s not possible, he said in an angry tone. I want everyone to be a part of our wedding & our married life. I want our parents’ blessings & I don’t want to hurt any set of parents. While he was speaking he too knew that what he was proposing was next to impossible. The tears dried on her cheeks. The pressure was taking a toll on her. She looked tired but still determined. Ice cream had already arrived at their table. He waited for her to respond, but she preferred keeping mum. Don’t know why but he couldn’t look into her eyes now, he looked down only to realize the ice cream has already started melting. He held her hand & before he could say anything she withdrew it & started walking out of the parlor. He realized, this well might be the last time they shared an ice cream, this might be the last time he shouted at her, this might be the last time she cried helplessly in front of him, the last time he tried consoling her unsuccessfully. While he was thinking his cell phone rang, it was her message, “I won’t give up, love you”. As the screen started looking hazy he reached out for the tissue paper & said to himself “I can’t afford losing her”
With every passing day, she struggled through the discussions leading to arguments with her parents. He thought of breaking up every fortnight, but every sunrise gave him energy to hold on. The “might be last time” thing kept haunting him every time they met.
Might be the last time I hold her hand, last time she helped me cry, last time she listened to my senseless talks about hope, last time she urged me for a register marriage, last time we go on a long drive, last time we shared a cup of coffee, last time we walked  a mile without saying a word, last time we just sit together for hours, last time she shrugs her shoulders to my hopeless questions, last time I see her off, last time she asked me to pick her from her office, last time she spoke about her professional problems, last time she asked me to spend a Sunday with her, last time she understood my silence. The fear of losing her one day had grown to such an extent that he had started thinking subconsciously that everything related to her might end soon. He had decided not to think about it anymore, he had left it to God & destiny. He had started living today.. Yes he knew that was temporary but that was the only way he could enjoy every moment spent with her.
And one day to his surprise he got her call early in the morning. Dad has agreed to come down for a discussion, he has finalized some dates of the next month & wants to check your father’s feasibility & availability for the same, she told in the happiest tone ever he had heard. He just couldn’t believe what he heard. Before he could respond she started speaking again let’s go & check the hall availability for the dates short listed by Dad. I don’t want anything to go wrong now, see you at 11 at CCD. While he was trying to recover from the sweet shock she hung up the phone.
In the next few hours they ensured that nothing will go wrong at least not because of the availability of the wedding halls on the short listed dates. They enquired about rent, catering, decoration, conveyance & all the necessary facilities. But they dint pay the advance, just because they wanted everyone to see the hall before booking.  Finally their patience was paying. Yesssss, he said to himself, there will no longer be the fear of the “might be the last chance” syndrome. She dint understand what he was talking about. When she gestured asking him what was that, he just responded with a sly smile.
Finally the day had arrived. Both the sets of parents were sitting face to face. He got a call from the wedding hall guy to confirm their date; he hung up the phone assuring him that he will communicate the date in an hour or so. They both were listening to their parents’ discussion with thumping heart. Everything was going well until the topic of shortlisted dates & halls came up. They both dint understand what happened & how it all happened. Who provoked whom to exchange bad words? Unfortunately the discussion had turned into an ugly argument. While her dad got up & pushed back the chair in anger, other members involved in the discussion continued cursing each other. He sat frozen in his chair when she left his house with her parents. Her dad said in a frustrated tone that he dint expect such a response from his parents, he folded his hands as he walked out.
Beep beep… his phone rang. It was her message, “This might be the last time we met, take care… Love u lots…”
His phone rang again, with teary eyes he watched at the hazy screen of his cell. It was the wedding hall guy again. He pressed the decline button. His phone rang again & again & again. After 12th consecutive call he picked up, the person from the other side warned him in angry voice, “Sir this might be the last time I am calling you to confirm your booking date, otherwise we have lots of customers in the que”
“Go ahead with the new booking” he said while he fought against the choking throat.
As tears rolled down his cheeks, he said to himself…
 “Last time, this indeed is the last time”

Kay P. Aar

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